Princess Kate and Me: My Personal Struggle with HG by Robin Bazes Aron

Princess Kate and Me: My Personal Struggle with HG by Robin Bazes Aron

The recent media attention over the Duchess of Cambridge (Princess Kate’s) pregnancy and hospitalization due to “severe morning sickness” (AKA Hyperemesis Gravidarum) hit home in a big way.

Like Princess Kate, I am pregnant (with my third child) and I too suffer from the rare, but debilitating condition known as Hyperemesis Gravidarum (HG).

HG, for those who have not heard of it ( and most people, before the news of the Duchess, had not) is a rare form of severe nausea and vomiting that occurs in pregnancy, and can last for a few months, but for some people, lasts from the beginning until the last moment of pregnancy. HG is not to be confused with normal morning sickness experienced by many women in pregnancy. It is a debilitating, dangerous, and potentially life threatening condition.

Just a few weeks before Princess Kate’s hospitalization at 7 weeks pregnant ( funny that that is exactly when it starts for me- at 7 weeks) I was hospitalized in my 10th week of pregnancy and put on a drip for a week, consisting of nutrients and anti-vomiting drugs usually reserved for cancer/chemo patients. This was, unfortunately, not my first encounter with HG…

During my first year of marriage, I became pregnant with my first child, and I was over the moon! I couldn’t wait to be pregnant, to have a baby of my own, to begin my family, and to have a large family, which was always a dream of mine from the time I was a little girl.

At around 7 weeks pregnant, I started feeling very sick. I had to stop working, and couldn’t get out of bed. I had heard of morning sickness, and just thought that what I was experiencing was normal. I went to my obstetrician, who wasn’t very sympathetic, and he prescribed me with an anti-nausea drug, which despite being potentially dangerous during pregnancy, didn’t help at all.

One day, after 48 hours of continuous vomiting, and not being able to keep even a sip of water or a cracker down, I admitted myself to the hospital. I don’t remember ever feeling so deathly ill in my entire life. I was dazed and confused. I remained on a drip for 10 days, and I actually felt a lot better while being on the drip, even though I still vomited several times each day. Well, they couldn’t keep me on a drip in the hospital forever, they said, so they upped my dose of the medication that didn’t work, and sent me home.

Being off the drip made me feel very sick again, and my days consisted of waking up, vomiting, taking the medication, trying to eat or drink small amounts, vomiting, going to sleep- and the next day, the cycle continued. For 9 months.

Even when I wasn’t vomiting, I was so nauseous, to the point that I could not daven (and at a time when I felt I needed to daven the most!) because just the act of moving my lips would be enough to send me into a cycle of vomiting again. Just trying to read the words in the siddur, or read anything else, would make me dizzy and nauseous, as well as not being able to concentrate on what I was reading, because my brain wasn’t functioning properly due to lack of basic nutrition.

My relationship with my husband was severely strained, because when he would come home from work, I couldn’t even mouth the word “Hello.” Instead I would give a little wave of my hand, and that was it–for months. Sometimes I would vomit in my sleep, and wake up to find myself and my bed covered in vomit. He didn’t understand, being the oldest of 9 children, and living in a predominantly very religious community, where pregnancy just seemed to him to be a very easy, everyone-else-is-doing-it-so-why-can’t-you-do-it affair.

The truth is I didn’t understand it either. I had a midwife acupuncturist come treat me once a week. I don’t know if it helped, but just having someone to talk to was nice, as I was completely cut off from the world. Once, at an appointment with my obstetrician, he suggested an abortion, and I quickly dismissed his comment. He then proceeded to tell me that, “Look, not all religious people are able to have large families.” I was so upset by this comment, as I still, I guess, held on to the belief that HG was not going to happen to me again. I was very young, strong, and idealistic, and I had a lot of faith. I said to him, “This is just happening to me because it’s my first child, and my body is still getting used to the hormones; it’s not going to happen to me again.”

I was hospitalized a second time, and again a third time 6 weeks before I gave birth. As my obstetrician stood at my bedside with a few of the midwives, he said, “It’s a miracle that she has survived, and it will be a miracle if this baby survives.” I still didn’t realize how serious my condition was- the term HG was still foreign to me, as no one had ever mentioned it.

B”H, I gave birth 10 days early on the second night of Shavuot, which fell on a Friday night, to a beautiful baby girl. Literally the minute I got up after giving birth and was taken into my room, I felt like a new person- back to my old self! Instinctively, I made sure to find a plastic bag somewhere, and put it under my pillow, as this is what I had been used to doing for 9 months- always prepared to vomit- but this time, I woke up in the morning and I didn’t vomit! I was overcome with emotion and burst out crying. How amazing.

My daughter was growing up and out of the baby stage and I wanted more children. We needed to be realistic, and have a plan in place just in case the HG would hit me again. Who would help me look after our daughter if my husband was at work from morning until night? We decided to move to Israel from Melbourne, Australia, where we were living, in order to be near my parents, who would help us if need be. Upon arriving in Israel, I became pregnant straight away. My daughter turned two and the sickness returned at 7 weeks pregnant, and we had to stay put at my parents’ apartment, living with them for the next 9 months.

B”H, my parents were amazing, making sure someone was always home to look after my daughter, making sure her routine and life stayed somewhat normal, and making sure I ate and drank as much as possible.

But, it was still not easy. I vomited every day, several times a day, and for months I could not keep anything down, except for icing! Yes, I kept a tube of cake icing under my pillow, and day and night, I would suck on the tube. I was miserable, and this time, I thought I was going to go crazy- I just couldn’t handle all this again. I was not able to do anything for my daughter- one time she asked me to peel her a cucumber, I tried, I got out of bed, but I didn’t have the physical strength to even peel a single cucumber!

I was lucky enough to have an amazing, caring obstetrician, who was South African, and had been the royal obstetrician in South Africa before making Aliyah. The only time I left the house or even got out of bed during the entire 9 months was either to see him, or to see an acupuncturist.

The obstetrician put me on the same medication as in my previous pregnancy, and despite staying on it for the entire 9 months like in the first pregnancy, I don’t think it helped at all.

At one appointment he said kindly, “I know you are religious, and what I’m probably going to say isn’t the right thing to say, but I strongly suggest that you have an abortion.“ He said that in Israel anyone who needs an abortion has to go before a committee, and proceeded to print out a letter to the committee, with the words “Hyperemesis Gravidarum” written on it. That was the first time I had heard of those words, and realized that I had a very real, serious condition. I told him I would not be having an abortion, but he was still so kind.

Unfortunately, my husband and my parents weren’t as adamant as I was, and repeated my doctor’s suggestion. I was hospitalized and put on a drip in this pregnancy as well. They were all worried that I was suffering and risking my life, and when you see someone you love suffering, it is very difficult. I repeatedly remained strong during “the abortion debate”- and I felt that I only had Hashem on my side.

Each time I went to the obstetrician, he would have me listen to the heartbeat, and he would say, “There’s your baby!” and he looked like he was going to cry each time!

At my last appointment before I gave birth, he said, “Even if this baby is a girl (he knew my first was a girl), you can’t do this again. That’s it.” My parents also told me that they couldn’t go through this again.

That’s when I stopped thinking of myself, stopped being stubborn, and realized that I had to accept my fate.
BH, I gave birth on the 18th (“Chai”, meaning “life”) of Shevat, to a beautiful baby boy, whom we named Eliezer Tzvi after two relatives and also because I felt that the name “Eliezer” or “Hashem helped me” really suited my situation.

Upon returning home, 3 days after I had the baby, I was already power walking up and down the main street where my parents lived. I felt great. I stepped outside, and felt the sun on my face for the first time in 9 months, and I burst out crying. To live again! It was amazing.

At my six week post-partum check up with my obstetrician, he again reiterated that I was not to have more children. This time, I reluctantly said OK. I knew I couldn’t keep fighting my situation and my husband, my parents, the doctors. I knew that Halacha forbids hurting one’s body, let alone putting it in a life-threatening situation. I spoke to our rabbi, and explained the situation, and he said that I shouldn’t have any more children, ever.

How can I explain the disappointment and the daily struggle which I had within myself for the next 10 years? On the one hand, I said, “Hashem, I accept my situation. I have two beautiful children, a girl and a boy, and I’m so lucky. I truly love and enjoy being with them. They are my whole life, and they give me so much nachas. I must listen to what the doctors and what the Halacha says about my situation.”

On the other hand, every one of my friends has more children than me. I am not a jealous person at all, but about this I am jealous! I came from a two-child family, and I always KNEW I wanted and would have more children than my parents.
We moved back to Australia during the next 10 years, and I started my own business of Jewish mother and baby music classes. I decided that if I couldn’t have babies of my own, that I would work with babies, because I love them! B”H, the business became very successful, but there was still an aching in my heart.

During this time, I discovered a support group and website (www.helpher.org) for people with HG. Going on the website and learning about HG really helped me see that all the symptoms listed on the website were the exact symptoms I had experienced and that it wasn’t all in my head. I also realized that I was severely traumatized from both pregnancies, and that PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) was a well-known side effect of HG, even after the pregnancies are over. For instance, every time I would take out a plastic bag (used for vomiting into during my pregnancies) even when I wasn’t pregnant, I would experience PTSD symptoms!

During these ten years, I heard of a new medicine called Zofran (Ondansetron) which was being described as a miracle drug given to women in pregnancy for the treatment of nausea and vomiting. Even though it was mainly used for chemo patients, it was considered safe in pregnancy, and many women used it. I did a lot of research, and thought that maybe finally there would be some way that I could have a “normal” pregnancy…

Around that time, I started experiencing gynecological problems. I was diagnosed with the onset of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). I thought– Hashem really doesn’t want me to have any more children!

I decided to go to a healer, and B”H, the symptoms that I had been having from the PCOS disappeared. I was so impressed with him that I decided to tell him about my pregnancies and that I was completely traumatized from them, but that all I had thought about for the past ten years was having another child. That’s all I wanted in life. Could he get me over the trauma, and, combined with the Zofran that I had heard about, maybe I had a really good plan up my sleeve? I spoke with my GP, and we all thought it was a conceivably good plan.

Well, the healer really got me over the trauma. I was not afraid, and felt that I could do it again, and truly believed that armed with Zofran, I would be able to have a pregnancy like everyone else-I would be able to continue working in my successful business, look after my family, and everything would be great! And not only have just one more pregnancy, but many more!

I became pregnant, and my plan didn’t turn out as planned. I went to the GP to get a prescription for the Zofran, just in case, and then, at 7 weeks, it all went downhill. The vomiting began, even with the Zofran. I had to stop working, and let down my hundreds of clients. At 10 weeks, I was hospitalized, as mentioned above. I couldn’t function, just like in my previous pregnancies. One day during that hospital stay, the doctor on call came to me and we discussed whether I should have an abortion. She said she had just performed one for a woman at 16 weeks pregnant, who, like me, had HG, but went crazy from it, so they had to abort the baby ( and it was her first pregnancy).

Over the years, I had learned that in Halacha there are certain instances when abortions are allowed, e.g. when the mother’s life is in danger- the baby has the status of a “Rodef” [a person who endangers another’s life]. I called my GP, and my husband called our rabbi, and we all discussed it. I wasn’t so against it this time, as I felt that I really couldn’t go through all this again.

B”H, the next day was a new day, and I did research on the HG website, and realized I needed to up the dose of the Zofran and have more medications added to it, if I was going to go home and do this again.

But being on all these different potentially risky medications during pregnancy is not the best thing for babies, either. Believe me, through each pregnancy, taking medicine was the last thing I ever wanted to do, and I hate reading articles that say women in pregnancy should never take any medication! But if it’s a matter of life or death, there really is no choice. It’s really not my ideal, but unfortunately, I thought I had a plan in place, and my plan didn’t really work out!

In the end, today I just lie in bed or on the couch, like in my 2 previous pregnancies, and can’t work, take care of my kids, my husband, or myself. I certainly cannot serve Hashem properly or do mitzvot. I rarely leave the house, because it is a whole mission. If I push myself too much, and by pushing myself, I mean doing simple tasks, I will vomit. My day consists of trying not to vomit, taking medications, and trying not to vomit- and then I go to sleep, and the next day, the cycle continues. I try not to vomit, because with HG, one vomit leads to another, then another, it doesn’t stop, it’s a vicious cycle and then you have to be hospitalized again…

I am now 28 weeks pregnant, in my third, and I really unfortunately have to say this, my last pregnancy. My husband has been amazingly supportive, as we all finally understand what HG is all about. My children, ages 13 and 11, have also been amazing. I have a wonderful team of doctors who are caring for me, and we have all discussed that this is it- for real this time. I have no more plans or tricks up my sleeve, and just have to come to terms with the fact that there is nothing more I can do.

Hashem had a different kind of plan for me than I expected, and …I just have to throw up my hands and surrender to His plan.

It hurts that I won’t have as many children as I want to. It hurts reading articles that say how important having many children is–I have never come across an article for those of us who desperately want more children, but because of medical and halachic reasons, cannot, even though we physically are able to have more.

The creator of the HG support group and website was interviewed when Princess Kate was hospitalized for HG. I find it interesting that this whole thing happened while I was pregnant. In some way, for me, it validated my condition. She said,”Hardly anyone knew about HG before, but now the whole world finally knows about it. “

A lot of people thought that the call that the Australian DJs made to the hospital was so funny and not a big deal. But would anyone have made such a call if the Duchess had had a heart attack, or some other life- threatening condition? No, they wouldn’t have, and maybe now people will realize that HG is as serious a condition. When I saw Prince William leaving the hospital by himself one night, looking very upset, I started to cry, because I know the pain of HG, the devastation, and it is no laughing matter.

I am lucky to have had a lot of support during this time. The community stepped in and made meals for my family. My husband’s family has also been supportive, and friends are checking in on me all the time. I also have one dear friend who comes to visit me on a weekly basis- I can cry and complain to her and she doesn’t mind. She has been amazing to me.

Many people will never understand. They wonder why I can’t just snap out of it and pull myself together. Believe me, I try every day! But it is like anything in life- if you haven’t experienced it yourself, you can never fully understand what it’s like…

Robin ( Bazes) Aron was born in Los Angeles, moved to Israel at the age of 13, and currently lives in Melbourne, Australia with her husband and children. She is looking forward to having her baby, so she can get back to her roll as homemaker and running her business, “Robin’s Nest” again!

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40 comments

  1. Thank you thank you thank you for writing this! I am currently 10 weeks pregnant with my second, both with severe HG (although not quite as bad as yours). I have been forced to temporarily move in with my in-laws so that they can care for me and my 2.5-year-old, while my husband stays at home so he can work.

    There are so many conflicting emotions during a pregnancy like this, and someone who hasn’t been through it can’t understand. The guilt of abandoning your existing children, the despair of doing this yet again, the fear of what will happen to you and the unborn child, the muted joy that you know you are bringing another beautiful life into this world.

    After my first pregnancy, people would tell me “But it was so worth it, wasn’t it?” I cannot in all honesty answer Yes to that question. I would not trade my child for ANYTHING in the world, I wouldn’t go back and not have her. But are nine months of debilitating, life threatening illness, not to mention the recovery period which can potentially last years, are they really worth it for anything? I love my daughter and I will love this unborn child just as much, but I don’t think that anything in this world justifies such suffering.

    Like you, I started out this second pregnancy with Zofran from the beginning (unlike last time when I received completely inadequate medical care). I was expecting it to be my miracle drug and I had all sorts of plans in place to make this work – and it’s just not working. I’m scared to weigh myself these days because the number just keeps getting lower and lower. I lay in bed feeling helpless and wishing that it would all be over (except in the good way, with a healthy, full-term baby in my arms). Why can’t we invent a time machine that just speeds up the gestational process? I could suffer like this for nine days, if I needed to. But not nine months.

    One of the most hurtful things is when I tell people that I just can’t do this again, and that I really hope this one is a boy so that I’ll have one of each, and they tell me that in another year I’ll change my mind and it’ll be fine and I’ll have more kids. You know what – it really isn’t fine. This isn’t like a simple cold or even the flu. This is something much more serious and when I’m saying that I never want to do this again, I’m not joking.

    Thank you so much for writing this piece and giving people some insight into what this really is and how much it hurts on so many levels.

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      Wow, I could have written this comment! I know EXACTLY how you feel.
      The suffering is unlike anything else, and the ramifications of these HG pregnancies last a lifetime. I really don’t know how I’m doing this again. Each day is a battle, I know.
      Don’t listen to those comments by other people- those people never experienced HG, and will NEVER understand.
      I wish you all the best and lots of strength, and please know you are not alone!!
      Robin

  2. I was living in a chareidi community in Israel. There was tremendous social and religious pressure to have a large family. So despite my extreme suffering and losses due to HG, I kept trying. (I will say that as HG is now better understood, today the rabbis are much more liberal in permitting limiting family size due to this condition) I have four children – I experienced HG as you’ve described above with all of them until I delivered. Surprisingly my 4 births were easy and I felt great immediately afterward in each case. But I have spent literally a total of one YEAR of my life in hospitals hooked up to an IV when I count all the pregnancies. I was pregnant FOURTEEN TIMES – thirteen of those with HG – the other one was an ectopic pregnancy. The nine pregnancies that didn’t result in a live birth ended as missed abortions – the fetus failed to thrive and died in utero. This occurred between 11 – 15 weeks. I always knew when the fetus had died because that was when my HG started to go away, and a sonogram always confirmed the grim news. I was throwing up every 15 min around the clock when I had HG. I will never forget calling a neighbor to come over to give me some sips of water – I was too weak to hold the cup on my own! This was in pre-Zofran days, and pre-internet days for that matter, before the wonderful HG website. I also was told that HG was a psychiatric illness – it was “in my head.” I am so relieved that things are better today – that doctors are taking this condition seriously and there is some treatment available. I got so bad that my liver and kidney function were compromised (all better now). My hair fell out. (People thought I had cancer and was undergoing chemo – I looked really sick). Also, I was always a stay-at-home mom – because I knew that as long as my 15-year “career” was trying to have a family, I would be unable to work due to the HG. I basically gave up on the idea of ever being a working woman even when my childbearing years were over, as it’s pretty hard to enter the marketplace in your 40s in a bad economy with no job experience. I guess the real miracle is that I’m still happily married to my husband of 35+ years! I put my entire family through hell with my HG, and they (and especially my husband) have been wonderful. My mother also had HG and my daughter has it as well (I am a grandmother now). My daughter goes in 2x a week for IV as an outpatient; she gets Zofran and electrolytes through the IV and it keeps her somewhat functional, and even though she doesn’t feel well, at least she doesn’t feel like she’s going crazy. Looking back, I was so stupid to keep trying – – I should have been concentrating on raising the children I did have. Instead I wasn’t present for my children – I was always sick and/or in the hospital with my pregnancies – – and I was always unhappy and morose, which is horrible for children to see their mom like that all the time. I’m grateful that my kids are normal and that they’ve become good parents to their own children — I certainly wasn’t there for them when they needed me when they were young.

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      Your story is heartbreaking, and at the same time, your strength is really admirable and amazing! People don’t realize what a miracle it is if an HG baby and mother survive- you only have to go on the HG website and read about all the losses, like yours.
      Even since ten years ago, when I had my other kids, there is much more awareness today in the medical field about HG.
      My other kids were also in the pre-Zofran days, and I have to say, without the Zofran, I wouldn’t have even had the strength to write this article. It has really helped me, even though I still struggle every day. Thank you for your courage in writing your comment- I’m really sorry for your losses, and wish you all the best,
      Robin

  3. Hi Robin,
    I have never posted here before, but I feel led to do so. Have you looked into HG as being a nutritional deficiency? Many women have had success when they upped certain nutrients (in pill or powder form) instead of potentially harmful medications. If you are interested in hearing more about it, you can email me at the email I provided in the mail box above. 🙂

    • I’ve never experienced HG myself, but from what I’ve read, this condition is beyond needing extra nutrition. If it were that simple, people would trumpeting their success stories. I thank Hashem every day for not testing me with this particular test.

    • Believe me, if HG was a simple matter of nutritional deficiency, we would treat it as such and not subject ourselves to the suffering. While it is true that increasing B6 and Magnesium intake can help, it by no means cures it and many women even find that that increase doesn’t help at all.

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      Unfortunately, I don’t think it is that simple. Even something as simple as water, is hard to keep down, let alone any other proper nutrients, healthy food, etc. Sometimes, you get a sudden feeling that you can keep icing down (as I did), and even though that is certainly not ideal, if it’s icing or starving to death, you take the icing. Going on the HG website, there was a woman who was pregnant with twins, and the only thing she could keep down for 9 months was the soft drink Dr. Pepper! She wasn’t thrilled about this, as I’m sure you can imagine, what with the caffeine in it, etc., but she had 2 healthy boys, and after that, in subsequent pregnancies, she had to abort her other babies because she couldn’t even keep Dr. Pepper down, and her organs started to fail, and if they wouldn’t have aborted the babies, she would’ve died. So, because of Dr. Pepper, and only Dr. Pepper, she has two healthy sons today!

  4. Sara Menashe

    Robin,

    B”H leda kallah! Although that has not been a problem for you B”H! I wish you all the energy and strength as you prepare to give birth again. I also wish you peace and comfort knowing you are working with H” to make the best decision for you and your family!

    Thank you for sharing your experiences!

  5. I cried throughout the article – it must be so hard for you
    I’m almost 60, and have had B”H 4 healthy babies (and 5 misses), and I probably had a MILD form of HG so I can a little bit empathize
    I was nauseous and vomitting all 9 months in all pregnancies – but I was able to go to work – but I always wondered why I was sick the whole pregnancy when the norm was just in the mornign and just for the first 3 months (my sickness started at 3 months)

  6. Dear Robin –

    I’m so sorry to hear of your suffering and am amazed at your courage. I was just wondering if you ever tried marijuana for the HG. I had a neighbor who experienced terrible morning sickness which was rendered more tolerable by smoking occasionally throughout the day. And believe me, this was a frum woman who never smoked or drank before. But she was desperate, and it helped get her through three pregnancies. Just a thought…

    • The thought of smoking *anything* when you have HG is unimaginable. However I do know that in those states where marijuana is legal for medical purposes, it is available also as a tincture (drops you put under your tongue). I do not know if any doctors would agree to treat with medical marijuana – – are risk factors to the fetus known?

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      Thank you for the suggestion. I am wary of trying Marijuana, but appreciate your input!

  7. There is someone at my shul who had her 2nd and 3rd children through a surrogate. It is the biological parents’ egg and sperm; the surrogate “just” carried the baby. Years ago when surrogacy was new, and I was suffering from HG, I asked a rav if surrogacy was permitted if there was no doubt that it would be the egg/sperm of the biological parents. I’m not paskening for anyone else here, but he told me that it theoretically was permitted, but that it was important to find a surrogate who would agree to eat only kosher foods the entire duration of the pregnancy, and that prerequisite would be hard to fulfill. I’m curious now if HG sufferers have considered this option.

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      I have definitely seen this option being discussed on the HG website, but Halachically it is complicated, as far as I’ve heard.
      Also, my husband is not comfortable with it, but thank you!

  8. Dear Robin,

    Thank you for courageously sharing your story. It left me brokenhearted and literally in tears. I too had severe nausea and vomiting for all nine months of my three pregnancies, though nothing compared to your experiences. I just wanted to share that in some small way I can relate to the debilitating, hopeless feeling of vomiting all day every day for months and months. With my first, I just toughed it out, vomiting anywhere and everywhere… on the bus, on the street, at work, in front of people. I could not control it and it was humiliating and disgusting. With my second, I could not go through that again so I took the maximum dosage of diclectin, an antinausea drug commonly prescribed in Canada. It stopped the vomiting but not the churning nausea, which continued unabated, and in a way was worse because I had no momentary relief that vomiting would bring. Strangely, I took a sharp turn for the worse immediately after the birth and was hospitalized with a drip for unknown reasons. Frightened and demoralized by the drugged experience, the third time I went drug free and simply accepted the debilitating nausea as part of my life. I was not working so it was easier to vomit when I needed to in the privacy of my home, though I think I did traumatize my other children quite a bit. The third pregnancy was BH the easiest of the three.

    With all due respect, and without judgement, I must say the part that shocked me and saddened me the most was your husband`s reaction. His wife vomits in her sleep and `he can`t understand`and pushes for an abortion? Though to be fair, when I mentioned your story to my husband, his first words were, `Oh my gosh, her poor husband` so maybe its a male thing :S

    This is one of the most amazing articles I`ve read so far on this site. Well done and thank you Chana Jenny for bringing attention to this little known issue. Dear Robin, may Hashem compensate you for all your sufferings and may you merit that all your dreams for your children and family come true.

  9. Sharon Botesazan

    Thank you for writing this article. I cried the entire way through. As someone who had, thank G-d, easy pregnancies, I really appreciate hearing a different perspective; it reminds me of the importance of gratitude. We can never take what we have for granted. May you have only nachat and brachot from all of your children, and may Hash-m give you strength through your pregnancy with an easy birth and a healthy baby.

  10. THERE IS A SOLUTION FOR HG!
    i also suffered from HG in all four of my pregnancies, and was hospitalized for months cause i couldn’t keep anything down.
    In my fourth pregnancy someone told me they had a friend that suffered like me and then went to a woman, and she worked miracles. i had tried EVERYTHING, and NOTHING worked, but i was willing to try anything cause i suffered so much.
    Anyways, i went, and after a couple of times (takes between 2 and 4), my nausea had gone down by 85 or 90 percent!!!!!!!!! i could function! i could do housework, be with my kids, LIVE!!! and only sometimes would be a tiny bit nauseaus in the morning till i ate.
    She’s a cranio-sacral therapist. There are cranio-sacral therapists all over the world, so even if you’re not in Israel, you can probably find one.
    Her number is: 054-6480667 or 054-5360667 her name is Donna.
    I strongly suggest you try it cause it’s only 2 to 4 times you have to go, and it ACTUALLY WORKS!!!!!!!!!!!
    GOOD LUCK!!!

  11. A good friend of mine has HG, and has 4 children now. After the horrors of the first pregnancy, the doctors figured out a way that she could manage her health at home. They put in a permanent PICC line, and showed her how to hook up her own drip line, nutrient supplements and nausea medications. She didn’t eat a single thing for 9 months, but it helped control the HG fairly well. She’s still planning on having many more kids, with a lot of medical and family support of course.

    B’sha’a Tova, everything should go well and leave you in good health!

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      Thank you for your comment! Unfortunately, they do not do the PICC line, etc. at home here in Australia.

  12. I’m a nurse here in the sates and yes I ve seen HG patients is no fun. BH you have have three children just hang in there, ask them to put the picc line and take the drip from home you can have a house nurse come in as well or have your husband or yourself learn how to do it. And having three kids is great, you accomplished you’re goal don’t feel bad about it, i guess i can understand that for a women when one is told you cant have any more is like you want more but your life and the life of youre baby is more important. good luck. ask them if they can give you some Total Parenteral nutrition you can home with this with the picc line.

    • Robin Bazes Aron

      Thank you so much for your caring words. In the states they do the PICC line, etc. at home, but unfortunately, they don’t do this in Australia.

  13. wantsababy

    I couldnt even finish this…I’m trying to be sympathetic but to all the women who can’t have kids for whatever reason, this article can hurt

  14. I feel a bit the same way as ‘wantsababy’, but there’s no reason to get so upset. These people with HG are suffering a real nisayon. You don’t need to ask yourself – would I rather be pregnant and suffer or not get pregnant at all. Or get pregnant and have it keep abruptly ending in a miscarriage. It’s not a decision. We all have nisyonos and there’s no reason to make someone feel like they can’t complain just because their nisayon is different than your’s.

    I would just say – not in a mean way – that you should work on trying to be happy with the children you have and trying to get rid of the “I wish I had more” attitude. I have miscarriages and it’s hard and I’m trying to work on the same thing. But there is a point that can be reached where we just say – Thank you Hashem for the ones I have and I’m satisfied.

    • wantsababy

      I agree with you, but at the same time, I would never publicize the fact I am choosing not to have children, when so many women are suffering. I’m not negating someones personal nisayon, but to go around and complain is not very sensitive. Just my thoughts…
      BTW how do you know I have any children to thank Hashem for?

  15. Dear Robin, I wish you so well, may you last it out and may you be blessed with a healthy baby, regain your strength quickly and may the new baby give you and all the family much nachas.
    My oldest baby is in his end 40s, no-one knew what to do about my excessive, debilitating nausia, great, there is now a little help and some understanding to be found. In those days, we were told it was all in the mind.
    With my third full-term pregnancy (there were 4 miscarriages in between) I vomited over the Gyny during delivery. So far, so difficult!
    The real miracle was yet to come.8 years and another 2 miscarriages later I was expecting again and wondering, how I would get through the ordeal. While I vomited more than average,right through the pregnancy, it was nothing like with the first 9 pregnancies.I am incredibly grateful for being blessed with children,as due to various other health-problems I hadn’t been able to take this for granted and the survival-chance of a delivery wasn’t high either, due to trouble with blood platelets.
    Haven’t got another grandchild to take to your music-classes, but I am sure,the one at BR Early Learning Centre at the moment will enjoy it, when you P.G. come back.
    Once more, many,many good wishes to you and yours. Rivkah

  16. Wow Robin, so many endless months of pain and suffering, Hashem should reward you with much nachas!

    Please keep us updated on the birth of your baby iy”h!

  17. Sara Menashe

    Yes, I agree with Hindel, if you can! I would love to hear how you are doing if you have a place and/or time for that! B”H! I want to pray for you and your family so if you are comfortable with that please email me your Hebrew names and I will continue to pray for leda kallah B”H and briyut, parnassah tovah for your family, shalom beit for all of you, etc. Thanks again for being so brave to share your story, and putting it out for all of us, which comes along with unfortunately some people being harsh and cruel.

    I wish you all the happiness in the world for the month of Adar, as well as in life always!

    Sincerely,

    Sara
    smenashe2009@gmail.com

  18. This is my exact story!!!!! I feel like I could have written it!

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