How it Feels to be Alone with my Baby
For the last two days, my 7 older children have been spread out among their grandmothers, grandfathers, aunts, and uncles across North America, and I have been on my own with our baby, 19-month-old Yonatan.
You would think that going from mothering 8 children to mothering 1 child would mean I am working only 1/8th as hard, a measly 12.5% of my regular effort. You would think that, with just Yonatan to care for, this vacation I am really on vacaaatioooon!
But I will tell you the truth. Taking care of Yonatan, just Yonatan, is very sweet and cuddly and wonderful and…EXHAUSTING. In fact, I think caring for him one-on-one is just as exhausting and draining and non-stop as my regular mother-of-eight life!
The day before we left Israel, my friend, the author and women’s health expert, Elana Mizrachi taught a class at my home. She spoke about women and our wombs, and how, just as our wombs grow exponentially, from pear-size to almost-newborn-baby size, so too we women are, in our essence, flexible and creative.
And that is what I am thinking about now, as Yonatan chews on “Moo, Bah, La La La!” at my side.
How as a mother my heart is flexible and spacious enough to contain each and every one (whether eight or one) of the children in my life, just as my womb once spread so wonder-fully, so flexibly, so creatively, to hold each one of my children in a snug, life-giving embrace before they were born.