The Big Fight

The Big Fight

In 2011, my dear friend Toby* and her husband Menashe* spent a year fighting tooth and nail for Toby’s life. But b”H, after several months of difficult chemotherapy and radiation treatments the doctors said Toby was finally clean of cancer.

And then this past fall Toby and Menashe received terrifying news. Toby had found a lump, and the doctors were pessimistic.

It took around two weeks to get back the biopsy results, and when they finally arrived Toby called Menashe to share the incredible news: the lump was benign. Menashe was participating in a Tu B’Shvat Seder when he received the call, and he was so overcome with emotion that he stepped out of the shul and burst into tears.

When Menashe went back inside to rejoin the seder, he was bursting to share his excitement with somebody, so he turned to a young father sitting next to him. The father shared Menashe’s joy at the wonderful news.

Fast forward to last week. Toby and Menashe were having a disagreement and fighting tooth and nail.

Menashe stormed out of the house in anger and was mumbling to himself in fury when the young father from the Tu B’Shvat Seder happened to be passing by.

Placing his hand on Menashe’s shoulder, he said: “Hey Menashe, how’s your wife?”

And all the anger Menashe had felt melted away in an instant, and he turned around and went back home.


  1. I think this post could have been just as powerful if names were not mentioned, by simply writing “a dear friend” and “her husband”. a beautiful story and wonderful lesson, just maybe a bit personally revealing.

  2. I loved this, thank you for sharing!

  3. Perspectives can change. To stay in touch with our main focus is so important.

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