Not Doing Teshuva this Year

Not Doing Teshuva this Year

Yoni’s kindergarten teacher sent out an exercise video she’d made for our boys to use during lockdown. I told Yoni: “The ganenet sent you exercises to do! How fun!” as I handed him my phone. But instead of doing the exercises himself, a few minutes later I found Yoni lying down flat on the sofa, intently watching his teacher doing head rolls like she was The Magic School Bus.

Which reminded me of how over the last few weeks, I’ve been listening to so many amazing teachers teaching inspirational classes on the concept of teshuva. If I had the time (and not a house bursting with Weisbergs) I’d be happy to listen to those teachers teaching all day about teshuva!

But actually do teshuva? Yawn. First of all, what have I actually done that’s so terrible? Secondly, being in lockdown with all my kids is certainly providing sufficient atonement for any misdemeanor I did commit!

But after I saw Yoni watching the exercise video I got the message. I went outside, sat on a bench under some pretty trees and admitted something I’ve been doing wrong for literally decades. I felt regret for that. I committed to a plan to not do that again. And I verbally confessed what I’d done to Hashem.

It felt good, truth is. To actually do teshuva. And not just lie down on the sofa and watch. It felt like, after many years, a paper-weight was lifted off my soul.

6 comments

  1. Nice! You have become swift at noticing meaningingful messages out of mundane occurrences.

  2. I love how you always “get the message”!

  3. I love how you got inspired by the opposite of what inspired looks like!
    I am sure I am not the only reader terribly nosey and curious what you need to do Teshuva about, but as you wrote it is between you and Hashem.

    Enjoy your forced family time. On the Chagim everyone is not in school anyway, but the challenge is not having the usual outdoor, community options available. I once read a very inspired parenting book (which was amazing but I never followed through!) Some of the topics mentioned were developing a family motto, flag, and goal or mission statement!
    Excellent opportunity to have everyone participate in preparing for the chag in all kinds of ways. Also to pair up older with younger for supervision, assistance, entertainment – you name it.

    • true! I think I read the same (or at least similar) parenting book, and also didn’t follow through! steven covey’s 7 rules for highly effective families

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