How Many People Can You Make Happy at One Time? by Sarah Chana Radcliffe

How Many People Can You Make Happy at One Time? by Sarah Chana Radcliffe

You can’t please everybody all the time and this is particularly true in family life. One child loves your spaghetti dinner while another one hates pasta. The children are happily and productively making messes while a spouse needs a clean and orderly environment. The young ones want to go here but the older ones want to go there. And on it goes. When you acknowledge that keeping everyone equally simultaneously happy cannot be your goal (since it’s unattainable) you can free yourself to simply do what’s right and best – in your opinion – at any given moment.

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3 comments

  1. This is a very important topic with Jewish Moms. True, there is no way to keep everyone happy. However, the main focus of a mother has to be to keep herself and her husband happy, first and foremost.

    I have worked with many kids who went off the derech and although there are too many reasons and many times a combination of issues that lead to a child to chose their own path, I found one common thread between them all – the parents all had a difficult marriage.

    While mothers are sacrificing their own happiness, for the sake of their children, the kids see this and many get the wrong impression. They think that marriage is unpleasant, and they don’t was the same for themselves.

    This is why when you put work into creating a good relationship with your husband, you are giving the greatest gift to your kids. They are watching, and they will want the same path for themselves.

    Rabbi Nivin also discussed the importance of reconnecting with the spouse every day, so beautifully during the interview with Chana Jenny before Rosh Hashanah.

    It does not matter if you prefer a friendship marriage or partnership marriage, the main thing is that your children see that husband and wife are #1 to each other.

    Partnership Marriage
    https://godtorahisrael.com/partnership-marriage/

    Friendship Marriage
    https://godtorahisrael.com/friendship-marriage/

    P.S. Parents Are Not Held Responsible for Children Going Off the Derech
    https://godtorahisrael.com/parents-are-not-held-responsible-for-children-going-off-the-derech/

  2. When I opened this article I was hoping to find the answer, what does make everyone happy? I was a little disappointed with the “you just can’t so live with it” answer. I thought about it and there is one way to make everyone happy, be happy. The mother is the center, the compass and the thermometer of the home. If she is happy, it will radiate outwards and affect everyone.

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