I am Not That Wife Yelling at Her Husband
This morning I was so furious at one of my kids I could have screamed!
And then, while walking Yoni to gan, I noticed an older woman in a car screaming at her husband (who barely seemed to notice. Poor guy, looked like he was used to it…)
And that reminded me of something I’ve been working on a lot over the last few months…
My truest self, my soul, is not my thoughts.
My truest self, my soul, is the one watching my thoughts (i.e., this morning’s furious thoughts at my child.)
Just as I was the one walking by that car, seeing that husband getting a dressing-down from his wife. Not the yelling wife.
And being able to separate me from my thoughts helped (at least somewhat) to calm me down.
I’m not saying it’d ok to scream at kids/husbands/anybody. what I learned throughout the years is that we should never judge anybody either. even when they seem to be wrong. we don’t know what happened, why they are screaming etc. I agree it’s ugly to scream at a spouse (especially in public). but I’m not sure we can decide who’s the “poor” side of the story…
I don’t think the point here is to judge the woman. I understood more that when you see a scene like that, whatever actually happens, it can also be a message from Hashem to you in that moment to teach you what you need to learn. Like the lesson described in this entry. For all we know the real woman in the story had a good reason to scream but it doesn’t mean the lesson is any less valid.
I hear what you’re saying, you are making an important point