4 Minutes of Nachas

4 Minutes of Nachas

Tonight I went on a walk and I was feeling very worried about one of my kids. I remembered all the mothers I know who don’t have this specific worry to worry about. And that only (surprise, surprise) made me feel worse.

And then I remembered some advice a friend told me in the name of her parenting teacher Rebbetzin Spetner: spend 4 minutes every day focused on feeling nachas for each of our children.
So as I walked, I tried to focus on nachas instead of impending disaster. I thought of this one and that one and that one and this one. I didn’t do 4 minutes each, it was more like 30 seconds. But still it helped to pull me up out of my disempowered catastophizing into a calmer, we-can-deal-with-this-step-by-step mode.
So just in case you are worried about/frustrated with/struggling with one of your children (i.e., just in case you are a mother) I wanted to pass this suggestion on to you as well. Hope it helps!


  1. Thank you for sharing this- this is such a nice idea. iyH you should have lots of nachas from all of your children.

  2. This is a wonderful idea. I am sure kids also feel it when your eyes light up when you see them and it gives them life.

  3. Thank you! I love small steps that have a great impact!
    Also, when I start worrying or grumbling’ I stop, look at the background and say thank you for everything I can. For example, when worrying about choosing and paying for expensive summer programs for my child, I stopped and said thank you that my child has these interests, and has great options for the summer! ( and then remembered that originally I had worried that this child would be sitting home doing nothing)

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